entries archives affiliates profile

I decided to start blogging again because I feel like I haven't exhaled my bullshit enough, and I don't think Tweeting helps much, because I worry that I might be annoying a lot of people, and I know they're annoyed, especially when I start flooding their feed. This introvert's got a lot of fucked up things on her mind, constantly over-thinking unnecessary little shitlings dancing around her brain. And her friends are all somewhere-else, too, so that doesn't fucking help. Doesn't fucking help at all. I miss you guys, what the frick!!! :-(

So I've been feeling super fucked up recently because of something. And it's pissing me off because I usually just.... ignore it and I'd eventually forget about it and it goes away. I don't like talking about it, I like to run away from problems. Such a wonderful way to live, I know.

Blah blah blah but oh look, that annoying guy on the Travel channel is learning to make sushi! Must.watch.

I don't like that you've got me all figured out.

So please, be my guest and get the fuck away from me because..... I..... I.... you make me feel psychotic. And I'd like to thank you. I was doing fine with life and shit, you know, and you just had to.......rihhshfsdjkfkjsdgs fuck it all up. Aaaaand I'm overthinking. I like blaming other people, don't I? Ksughskdjhkjsdhfksdgjhbgyurfyfuarbfuwuwefhjbsjfbsdhj ejgbsdju sgusduigejwbg sjgusduewfsjgwjheej. Ahh, that felt good. But not satisfying... yet. Ugh I don't know what else I should do.

Okay. Bye.









109 days since you left. I've been a mess thinking about the past. I regret a lot of things. I hope you forgive me for all the times I've been childish. You were always good to me.


Love always,
Nona




I always feel like I need to talk someone, but I never want to. I'm never sure why though. I've always kind of preferred analyzing it myself and making up all these theories and solutions about my 'situations' and 'problems' but I end up making way too many so I'm always like... confused. I'm never sure about anything when it comes to my life and shit about myself. What is it with me?

So… I've been spending a lot of time at home -- too much, actually -- and I guess it's just because like, I don't feel like talking to anyone, really. Is that bad? I'm pretty sure it is. A teeny-tiny amount of people have asked what's been going on but I just… prefer to keep it to myself. Besides, the truth is... even I don't seem to know what's wrong and it's probably because I keep avoiding to find out what the problem actually is (which would help me figure things out). That's just it about me: not only do I run away from people; I run away from myself, too -- or my thoughts, at least.

Maybe I do know what the problem is. Maybe I'm just in denial.

How the hell am I going to fix myself if I keep doing this?

What a mess.

I've faced way too any problems in the past so now when new 'problems' come my way, I just automatically not make a big deal out of it. And the thing is... I don't know if that's a good thing because like, in a way, it's like I'm considering myself unimportant or something. Whatever. I don't even know why I'm blogging.

Anyway hi, if anyone even reads this blog.